The longer you live,
the more you'll realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude should be more important than facts.
It is more important than the past, the education, the money,
the circumstances, the failure, the successes.
It is more important than what other people think or say or do
More important that appearance, your gift or skills.
It will make or break a company, a church, a home.
A relationship or a friendship.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for the day.
We cannot change our past.
We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the string we have,
and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.
And so it is with you...

We are in charge of our attitude.
We should be!

Haven't been blogging in a looong time.
Just felt like it. One of those days...

Sometimes I really think I'm one of those people who seem okay being misunderstood.
When I mean okay, actually I'm not.
I understand the need to clear things up.
I really do.
But somehow maybe I just have that strong will that I always believe we are all the same.
And that somehow we would understand each other.
I believe in the goods in people. I really do.
Regardless of all their flaws, I usually look pass them and like those that I like.
And ignore when those flaws appear.
I have faith in people.
What I don't have is the faith that people have in me.
And honestly, when all else fails, it's always yourself to be blame.

Maybe it's because we don't quite understand each other.
What i said wasn't blaming you.
And I'm never just doing things my way.
Sometimes, I do. But I do know when it's time, I'll back off.
But what hurts me the most in the fact that when I was talking/explaining with no judgemental intention at all.
But was taken to be simply because I wasn't composed enough.
Which is why I'd rather not open my acidic mouth.
When I mean not a big deal, I didn't mean it in a way that I don't care.
It's not a big deal to fuss it over with.
It's not a big deal to quarrel over.
It's simply not a big deal.
Because at the end of it, I know everyone's intention is right.
Even when mine may not be.

First entry in months, and I'm super sour. =(
But things happen for a reason.
And I know because I believe that I am here to go through life in the hardest possible way.
Just to appreciate the simplest form of everything.
Sometimes I succeed, but most of the time I don't.

And this is one of those times.

Purpose is the key to life.
We all believe that we have a certain purpose in life.
That keeps us going.
Without any purpose, there won't be any hope.
Without any hope, there won't be second chances.
For once, I believe in second chances.
I believed it when I got to see my grandfather once more after he passed.
I believed it when my mum sent me here to Singapore.
I believed it when ....
You'll believe what you choose to believe.
Even when there are no hard evidence to back it up.
A believe is so strong, sometimes it could cloud our senses.
And how do we even get serious without any sense?
And there's no sense to life.
You just can't figure it out.
For the better or worse.
We're all senselessly here in this beautiful or messed up world,
With or without a purpose.

I am who I am.
And somehow I can't seem to get you out of my head.
Damnit. Why couldn't I be like anyone else.
Or maybe that's the perks of life.
My perks. My life.

I've watched this religiously everyday numerous times for the past month.
And I never got tired of it.
A perfect mix of amazing song, amazing choreography and amazing dancer.
Tucker has never cease to amaze me.
His quality of movement is so unique, I don't know what not to like.
His conviction. His flow. His strength. His control. His versatility.
He's just inhumanly insane.
I may appear a little crazy and obsessed.
But when someone could dance in flip-flops,
I'm ready to kiss on whatever ground he/she steps on.



Now, who's obsessed again? *huge grins*

Do you always know what you want in life?
Maybe. Maybe not.
The fact is no one could be certain of everything in life.
Being a cynic is all but a choice, an option you could take or not take.
I'm grateful for everything that I have.
I'm also grateful for all the things that I don't have.
Because it allows me to grow continuosly knowing full well that,
I always have something to look forward to.

Dance has been a staple in my life for the past 4 years.
It's so therapeutic that sometimes it hards to explain why.
I may not be able to admit that dance is my passion.
But it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter if it's said or written or carved in in heart.
All it matters is whenever I dance, I get a certain enjoyment out of it.
Be it sharing what I love to everyone else who loves it too.
Be it laughing at myself for coming up with silly movements.
Be it being frustrated for not being able to catch steps.
Be it being scrutinized for things that I can or can't do.
Be it being laughed at and ridiculed for following my dream.
Be it just dance to let my anger/frustrations off.
There's a certain safety net that I can fall onto whenever I get to dance.
Dance is such a universal thing.
Don't get too entangled in yourself.
To improve. To be better. To 'master' a certain style.
To look like so and so.
Dance is communal. It's supposed to be shared.
To enjoy it with everyone else around you.
Once you get too tangled up with all those,
then how do you get a kick out of it?
And don't bring anyone down who has a different opinion as you are.
And never feel down when people have a different opinion.

Share it. Live it. Dance it.
Dance like how and what your body wants you to.

Betrayed by the people whom he loves most.
Pushed around by the 2 most important person in his life.
Used by the people whom he cares about.
Ostracized by the people who don't get what he's going through.
Blamed himself for being not knowing how to handle the situation.
LIfe's a mystery
Life is bullshit....

But these are merely words.
Formed by the countless thoughts and emotions entangling his mind and heart.
All contained in him, not able to let them pass.
To create appropriate actions accordingly.
There's no need for acceptance.
There's no need for approval.
Those are superficial.
All he seeks is living.
Living a life with no superficiality, concerns, cares, love ......
Living a life of 'boredom', so to speak.

Only if I don't have the mind and the heart to think and feel otherwise.
If only....

Love is such a short and simple word.
But everything else that tag along with it is anything but.

People say love should come from the heart.
But love being a complicated being.
It will tangled up with everything else besides the heart.
And that's when it all gets confusing.
Tangled. Confused.
When you try to find the connection between the heart and the mind.
And of course the body.
Everything else seems redundantly massive.
I don't get how my heart feels so much and my mind thinks so much.
Yet that body part of mine that is fluent in every other aspects of its use could be so extremely useless.
Why can't I godamn speak my mind or my heart or ...?

Love is such a short and simple word.
Yet everything else that tag along with it is anything else but.
Maybe it just have a peculiar way of affecting a life that is so devoid of one.
Or it has finally proven to have been present as of now.
Since it is anything but short and simple.
Love comes with such a great feeling.
And everyone should experience it one way or another.