Elizabeth: The Golden Age


Definitely my most anticipated movie of the year.
I love the first movie.
Which I thought deserve much more recognitions that it did.
Cate Blanchett is probably my favourite actress right now.
And one of the best actresses as well.
She has been in so many great films that I totally love.
The trailer is amazing.
Make me so hyped up for the movie.

Inside this isolated heart,
I built up dak solid walls.
Chained my mind into believing,
That there was nothing more to feel.
I locked all exits.
And burried myself in a death hole I had dug.
Inside this isolated heart,
My emotions was torn apart.

I stand alone,
In the world of confusion.
Pulling me in all directions.
Tugging at every emotion.
I stand strong,
Though I am weakened by memories.
Scratching at my mind,
Clawing from my insides.
I still stand alone,
In this world of bitter confusions,
Questioning why don't I have a family to run to?

And then I remembered.
Remembered those words that are supposedly going to change my life.
"One of the greatest feeling in life is the conviction,
that you have lived the life YOU wanted to live
- with the rough and the smooth, the good and the bad -
but yours, shaped by your own choices, and not someone else's."

Then I told myself.
Who would had expected this, but I.
Who would had predicted this, but I.
No one could understand.
Or see through the glass to another world, but me
No one could comprehend.
Or realize how much better life is, but me
What this has become is what I needed it to be.
And what this will grow into is simply everything.
I am but a mere reflection of what is and can be.
I am my own future within a single mind.
Here I stand and here I grow.
I continue to carry on.
To expect the unexpected.
To predict the unpredictable.
I understand this "new" world,
Because I truly appreciate how great this new life can be.
So who could have, but I.
And who else can see sunshine in this rain, but me.

who am i kidding?

There's a place that I know where everything is Ok.
Safe, Secure, Cherrished.
This place is also filled with emotion, friction, questions.
It seems to vanish.
but as it disappears, new one comes.

Theres a place that I know where anything is possible.
Goals, Dreams, Adventures.
This place is also filled with confusion, frustration, misunderstandings.
How can something be so simple?
Simplicity seems to become invisble.
But as they evaporate, new one grows in fear.
For i am searching...
and I dont know whether to run or face reality.
As this is what I have become.

Theres a place,
A place i belong.
I only wish I knew exactly where it was,
Instead of mere guessing.
I'm tired of taking chances and failing.
I'd like to win.
For once I don't want to feel abandoned,
left questioning or in solitude.
I need the answers handed to me.
And to feel fully alive.
If this is the place that I belong.
Why must it feel so hard to achieve?
I only wish i knew exactly how to get there.
And when I reach my end,
the pot of gold and jewels of blessings.
I'll know the pain I suffered was worth it
and the passion gained.

Will I ever reach there?

I can be the meanest person on Earth.
Everyone kinda knows that.
But sometimes I really don't give a shyt.
Simply because if anyone has enough guts to judge me.
Then I'm sure it means they have the purest of heart.
It really goes either way.
And It's fun to be mean sometimes, isn't it?
So here it goes.

1) BABIES SHOULD STAY AT HOME.
Don't get me wrong. I do have affection for babies.
Not in the paedophile way.
They're really cute.
But they're simply not ready to face the world just yet.
So don't bring them out, unless you really have to.
It's worse if you have to take public transport like MRT.
Because they just keep crying.
Because of the noises made by the moving train and the crowd.
As well as being surrounded by giants who still look aliens to them.
And forcing a pacifier up their little mouth to shut them up,
Is not a good parenting habit to have either.

2) KIDS WHO ARE OVERLY ACTIVE SHOULD STAY AT HOME TOO.
Again, I love kids. Some kids.
But of course I would have taken my shot gun.
And shoot those loud and noisy ones.
For parents who can't control their own kids.
They should just lock them up in a cage, like we do to dogs.

3)ONE PERSON ARE MEANT FOR JUST ONE SEAT.
I'm sorry for being 'fatist'.
I was once fat too. And I totally understand their feelings.
But if you are a two-seater person.
Then just sit in the middle of the two seats.
There is no point in trying to squeeze those humongous butt in one.
And leaving a few inches for another person to sit on.

4) PEOPLE REALLY NEED TO LEARN ON HOW TO USE THE URINAL.
Rule #1: Never look around when using the urinal.
Worse, if you tend to peep.
Rule #2: Don't do a forward and back motion with your hand,
in the middle of the action with your willy out.
Rule #3: Don't lift your shirt so high up to reveal your amazingly round and huge belly. There's gravity, people. Your urine won't shoot up onto your shirt. Unless of course you're doing some hand motion with your willy.
Rule #4: Don't unbuckle your belt and lower your pants to your knee to reveal your torn and tattered red underwear.
It's a sore in the eye.
Zips are invented for a reason.

I guess I really need all these distractions.
To keep me from going insane.
Letting go is harder than what I thought it would be.
There are so much more I could have given.

Try being mean.
Even if you have to pretend.
It's pretty fun.

14 September 1997.
I was thrown into this tiny little island.
It was a chance to move on with my life then.
It was a chance to live my life differently.
It was a chance to allow myself to let go, forgive and forget.
It was the second chance that many don't have.
I was here with no expectation.
I just live for the sake of living.
Along the way.
I changed. For the better.
I live a life that I never thought I would.
I met people who inspired me and change me.
I have friends whom I could depend on.
Last but not least, I was able to dance.
The past 10 years has gone beyond my imagination.
It has goes beyond what I would have hoped for.
And I'm totally grateful for it.
I never would have thought how this messed up little 12 year old boy,
Could have survived 10 years in a foreign country. Alone.
But I did.
I am proud of myself.
But beyond that, I was really grateful to be given the past 10 years.
To have a taste of what life really is.

I think I've lived on my own for far too long.
I could have climbed over my heard long ago.
Yet I am still here in one piece.
I am still here sane.
I am still here surviving.
Against all odds.
Even when sometimes I have given up.
Even when sometimes I don't see the light.
I've stuck around and carried on living.
To me, someone who don't see much in life,
it is an achievement in itself.
10 years have passed.
I've promised myself and you.
10 years is what I have given you.
I'm gonna start living a life that I want.
No longer bounded by the promises that have led me here.

For starter, I totally miss my family.
Never once in my life when I wish they shouldn't be here with me.
I'm a 22 year old guy who longed for the past 10 years back to be protected.
To be loved.
To be pampered.

Suntec Dance 2007 is finally over.
This was my first and definitely a worthy one.
Firstly to In Bass.
I'm really glad we did this together.
No matter what the result was.
No matter how different we all were.
No matter how much uncertainties, doubts we all had.
It always translate to the fact that we all love to dance.
And we all love to dance together.
At least for this competition. =P

In Bass has been a great opportunity,
for me to try out things that I've never tried before.
In Bass has been an amazing eye-opener,
for me in styles I never thought I would even dare to try on.
In Bass has been an escape,
for me to allow myself to do what I love to do.
In Bass has no doubt been an amazing chapter of my dancing life.
Sometimes, we do things because we really wanted to.
We all do it because we think we could gain something out of it.
Be it exposure, be it experience.
In Bass is all of those reasons combined for me.
At least, I could truly tell myself that.
If I ever look back at this experience, I'm totally satisfied.
Satisfied as a person, a dancer and as a group.

To Ter.
Amazing choreography, dude.
You are no doubt the most creative person I know.
All I have to say is that you are an incredible talent.
If I could multiply myself by 6 and be the 6 judges,
you would have definitely be my first place for the solo.
You are DOPE!

To Ken.
Do I even need to say how amazing you are?
LOL. I think saying it just makes it seems so cliche.
Love your solo. I totally hate the open solo results.
Seriously. what the heck were the judges thinking?

To Xiang.
Our third competition together dude.
And we've got 3rd in all of them.
I guess I must have been jinxed.
LOL. But it's always great to have you around.
=)

To Clement.
Well, I miss our JK Scafs days. LOL.
Seriously. Those were like fun.
Although you were disappointed.
For that matter, we all were kinda disappointed.
Result is fixed. There's nothing could be done.
Yet, it isn't always everything. =)

To Glen & To Big Jon.
My first competition with you guys.
And I totally enjoyed myself.
Although I hope you would lose those crazy facial movements u do,
when you try to catch beats, glen. LOL.
And Big Jon. Our group's bboy.
Bring it on. =)

To Ann.
For the love and support.
For the words of advice.
For the insipirational push to keep going.
For the committment.
For the time and effort.
For everything any dance students would have asked for.
Thanks for all those words of wisdom.
And how you always use those words to convince me.
To calm me down.
Damn. I guess I'm too easily influenced. :P
But Thanks. Love ya. :)

To NRA.
esp. Wynne for the studio, support and everything else.
As well as Jun Chao.
I would have loved to have you in the group.
BUt I'm sure we have other opportunities to dance together on stage again.
Anyway, thanks to everyone for their support.
Totally appreciate it. :)

To F-Beatx, PoshBites.
Congratulations. I'm glad we're in it together.
WQ, Allegra, Von, Deline, Mae.
You guys are still the super female dancers in NRA.
And will always be.
And Poshbites, challenge them. =)

To 8 Steps.
CONGRATULATIONS, DUDES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sophan, Ore, JiaJun, Ronnie, Alex, Farid, WeiJie, BaoWen.
Amazing show in the finals.
Admire you guys for your tenacity, determination and hardwork.
Amazing. And keep growing and dancing.

Last but not least,
to ROUGH ADDICTS.
CHAMPION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amazing item. Love it from start to finish.
The hardwork u guys put in definitely shown on stage.
Bec.
Way to go, partner. LOL. You're amazing.
Joyce.
You're the single most talented female dancer I've known. Period.
Yen.
Well. You're still too tall, that's why I don't like you. LOL.
But congrats. All those hardwork finally paid off. :)
Orange.
Yay. Yay. Yay. Liling.
You are going Australia. Bring me along.
LOL.
JJ.
Wohoooo. Who says being small coudln't look big on stage?
Congrats.
ShiMin.
Your MSN reminder must have worked.
Totally admire your hardwork and determination.
Congrats.
Xiao Bai.
Have I told you that you were great?
Congrats.

After reviewing what I've typed,
I just realized it's extremely cheesy.
But who cares.
I wouldn't ming switching up once in a while.
Special thanks to Ryan. Suraiya.
And my secondary sch classmates who came to support.
Thanks. :)

Wham, we shall commence with the shopping VERY SOON.
Promise. :)